Hubs and I are watching a REALLY bad movie right now, Chillerama.
Well, he’s watching it, I’m kind of watching it and writing a blog post and playing Scramble and wrestling with my extreme impatience.
I hate how long this takes. I just want to be in shape NOW. RIGHT NOW.
Anyone who says “Well, you didn’t get overweight overnight, so you aren’t going to lose overnight, either” is getting a crotch punt.
If there is anything I wrestle with, it’s this. I have been working my ass off. I’ve changed my diet in a big bad way. I’m far from perfect when it comes to my diet, but still, I’ve made some major changes.
It’s been months now. Two months.
Why am I not in a size 8?
The spermatozoa has grown teeth and has escaped. Hubs, who can go for DAYS without cracking a fucking smile, is laughing his ass off.
I’m not stopping, but I think it’s time to admit that I need to slow down. I’m working out between 80 and 120 minutes a day. I’m tired. I’m tired all the time. But I don’t stop, because I HATE FUCKING WAITING.
If I keep pushing myself, then I’ll get there faster, right?
I’m not in a race. It’s a journey. And if I think about it, I actually LIKE what I’m doing. I dig lifting weights. I am actually having a torrid, sweaty affair with my treadmill. Even the changes in my diet make me feel better.
Why can’t that be enough? Why can’t I appreciate the changes I CAN see and feel instead of straining so hard to see into the future. To what? The end? Is there an END to this?
No. This is my life now.
I must learn patience. I get impatient and I begin to feel overwhelmed which makes me feel even more tired.
Okay, even hubs had enough of the monster sperm. Looks like we’re back to rewatching Sons Of Anarchy.
We all struggle in different ways. What puts you off? What makes you feel overwhelmed?
How the fuck do you get over it?