Mine is pretty fucking thick. I’d go as far as to say my skin is thicker than my waistline and that is saying something.
My hubs is the reason for this post. He expressed a concern a couple days ago regarding the eventuality of someone posting a mean comment to my blog. Whether it be for my writing skills, subject matter or the size of my ass, sooner or later, someone will be mean about it.
I’ve had a few days to contemplate this. I have the stomach virus from hell and have been knocked on my ass. In the first 24 hours, I only left my bed to vomit. I pulled muscles in my rib cage from vomiting so hard. This is not a joke. I really did, so don’t make me laugh. It fucking hurts.
Anyway, it gave me time to think about my reaction to criticism. I will be the first to admit, I am NOT good at the criticism. I have a shit ton of insecurities and criticism will wake most of them up and make them holler. However, I don’ t think this issue is quite the same thing. Or maybe it is, I’m not a fucking psychologist.
Here’s the thing, this is what it boils down to: I was called a big fat girl by a toddler. Any mean spirited comment coming from an adult is filtered through their own insecurities. Or perhaps they have the emotional maturity of a blue berry muffin and need to stomp on others to feel good about themselves. Why the fuck would I care about any opinion formed in such a manner? But a toddler? Man, the very young just speak from the heart, don’t they? If I can process THAT insult, then the rest doesn’t matter.
I have since decided that my skin is thick enough to handle anything. I KNOW I’m kicking ass and getting into shape. I admire the shape of my big bad self more and more every day. I have a blast writing this blog. Am I a pro? Profound? Nope. But who gives a fuck? I’m having a great time.
Which leads me to an awkward and clumsy segue.
In case you ARE one of those people, and really, I’m focusing on those of you who ridicule the large people, I have a question.
First, let me make a disclaimer: Any skinny people reading this who have never judged another person for being overweight, or picked on another person for being overweight, or rolled their eyes at a fat person, this is NOT for you.
For the rest of you, here is the question. Why?
Why do you care so much if another person is fat? I’m sure most of you are kind and compassionate people. But why do you turn into dickheads when it comes to fat people?
You know what it reminds me of? High school. The uber popular kids had it all. They were respected, they were adored, they had the high school world at their feet. Why couldn’t that have been enough? It never was, though. And again, it’s not ALL of the popular kids, but enough to make a generalization. Why in hell did you have to pick on the completely unfortunate? Did it make you feel good? You already had EVERYTHING, what did you possibly have to gain by stomping on the those kids whose lives were already hell?
High school ends, the behavior does not. It’s the same fucking thing. The bullying behavior should end. The only way it will is for all of us to admit our behavior.
If you are skinny and you are reading this and you see ANY part of this in yourself, then can you do me one small favor? Can you ask yourself WHY? Be honest. Maybe, you’ll learn something about yourself. Maybe you’ll open yourself up a little bit. Perhaps, and this might be a stretch, but perhaps you could stop hating yourself a little bit. Because the only reason why I can imagine why ANYONE would be so hateful is because they draw the hatred from how they feel about themselves. Again, I am not a psychologist. It could be that you’re just a dick.
If you do find that maybe your views are bigoted or bullying or judgmental and that you’d like to try to change, then great! That would be helpful. It might give some of us larger people a little breathing room. Then we can change. Then we can go to the gym without fear of being sneered at. We can eat a piece of birthday cake in a restaurant without worrying that the rest of the patrons are judging us. We can stop being embarrassed to exist. And the REALLY big people? Well, maybe they can cease being invisible.
Or, maybe it won’t do a damn thing.
Your takeaway from this? If you find yourself being hurt by the comments of others, find away to toughen up. It’s their fucking problem, not yours. And if you’re one of those that can’t keep your mouth shut when you see an overweight person? Grow the fuck up and shut the fuck up.